Drumroll please.

80s POWER BALLADS!

Betcha didn’t see that one coming.

Oh yes, the power ballad is a dangerous time suck. It all started when I went of Facebook (I realize that therein lies the problem, but anyway), and I clicked on a post of Sarah McLachlan and Pink singing In The Arms of the Angel – not a 80s power ballad, I know, but stay with me. (On a side note, I have come across an alarming number of men from my generation who have professed that they would like Sarah to have their respective babies. This always makes my forehead crinkle into its pondering state.) While I was listening, I, of course, made the mistake of looking at that right column of suggestions, and what to my wondering eyes should appear? Total Eclipse of The Heart. Well, it was all downhill from there. Here’s how I spent the half hour that follow. (You have to imagine my clenched fist in the air and a very pained expression on my face as you read the list).

1) Total Eclipse of the Heart

Bonnie Tyler

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcOxhH8N3Bo&w=420&h=315]

*warning the video might give you nightmares* WTF was that?

….which lead to…

2) I Can’t Fight This Feeling Anymore

REO Speedwagon

…which lead to…

3) I Want to Know What Love Is

Foreigner

…which almost led to Richard Marx’s Right Here Waiting for You, but, come on, I’m not that desperate…

4) Joey

Concrete Blonde

Okay, so Joey isn’t really a power ballad and it was released in 1990, but it makes me want to cry, so it’s on the list!

…next came…

5) Love Bites

Def Leppard

Oh my God! Suddenly I’ve been transported back to Grade Eight! I’m in my grade school gym! I can smell the pre-pubescent sweat that comes with dancing to Banarama. I’m desperately in love. Will he ask me to dance? Oh the sweet, sweet pain. Too…much…emotion.

…and finally…

6) Alone

Heart

I consider it the great tragedy of my life that I can’t sing like Ann Wilson. I would even tease my hair to sing like Ann Wilson.

 

There you have it. I’m spent. Maybe I can get some work done now…or maybe I’ll pull out a yearbook or two.

And my top ridiculous source of procrastination this week is…

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